I run a database server and a webserver. I have memcache installed and in use for the vbdatasore. XCache is also installed.
The EAProc WaitQ column is always 0, even when the server load skyrockets.
phpsuexec is disabled.
The connection pool under Admin CP -> Actions -> Real-Time Stats -> External Application will occasionally show all available connections in use when the load skyrockets. Max Connections is currently set at 150. I have had it set as high as 300. I lowered it because it seemed that the higher the setting the higher server load.