Answers to you questions:
1) If you want to load balancing, you cannot use the rails easy configuration, have to follow the step by step configuration.
2) for the local rails install, you can use the "lsws/fcgi-bin/RailsRunner.rb", just add a environment variable "RAILS_ROOT" pointing to your Rails root context.
3) Yes, it can be done. It is controled by "Max Conn" configuration of the two external application, for example, set "Max Conn" on local server to 60, set "Max Conn" to the secondary server to "40", web server will allocate load as you wished. You can change that value as you need, just keep it at 6:4 ratio.
Thank you for your praise.